Comparing "War Wounds"
At this age, my buddies and I have all accumulated a wide array of physical ailments, whether from years of playing hockey, skiing or from doing things that were just plain stupid.
From time to time, we get into a roul over who has succeeded in becoming the most damaged over the years. One friend has had chronic back pain for over 20 years, another has a stiff neck and a torn shoulder. Still, another buddy chimes-in, "Yeah, well I've had three knee operations and a removed prostate!"----Ouch. Between all of us, we must have over 50 scars from an assortment of mishaps, ranging anywhere from wiping out on our bicycles when we were kids to falling down the stairs during drunken Frat parties.
It's like that scene from 'Jaws', when Schieder, Shaw and Dreyfuss are sitting around the table on the boat comparing all their 'War wound' scars (see video clip, below). Here's just part of my list of wounds and the lack of judgement that caused them:
When I was 6, a boat fell on my leg and broke it in 4 places; age 7, a burnt thumb from swirling a lit sparkler around; 10, several mud fights around our pond--got hit in the head with a big rock (I guess the other guy forgot we were supposed to be throwing mud, not rocks); 11--was bat-catcher and for some stupid reason I jumped in front of the batter and got the bat right in the back of the head; 14--put my foot through the glass shower door, blood everywhere then a ton of stitches; early Twenties--broken forearm, torn knee, broken toe and alot of hangovers; and Thirties/earlyForties--slipped, fell down steps and either broke or tore something-or-other somewhere in the vicinity of my right ass-cheek; fell off ladder 15 ft. up while cleaning eavestroughs and landed on the same right ass-cheek, pinching nerve and causing sciatica; skiing--twisted knee and broken toe; football--torn shoulder; and tobogganing with the kids--big wipeout=chipped knee-cap, bruised elbow and a sore ass.
Good thing I never took up sky-diving.
By all means, share your tales of mass-destruction in the comment section below....
...after all, misery loves company!